Reflections of our time in Portugal. Was it healing?

While we were in Portugal, a lot of people wrote that they loved to see me smile again which was very sweet. Our time there really felt very good and full of  Belle’s magic. Especially, of course, the time I spent with Kintana, and our precious Belle in spirit by our side. The many adventures we shared.
Kintana is amazing, she is such a special, sweet and beautiful soul. Every day, it touches me deeply how Belle led me to her and also to Portugal, the land where she was born. Because of her, we had the most wonderful and magical experiences.


Some friends wrote that our journey in Portugal must have been healing for me. If it was really healing? I don’t know. I don’t think I will ever truly heal from such a deep loss, my everything. It’s more about learning to live with it.
Yes, I did feel happy there, but I miss Belle terribly and talking or writing about her is still not easy. So many emotions I feel. It is that overwhelming deep pain in my heart and no, this intense pain has not decreased since I lost her on April 25th.

The last months I had many days that I didn’t know how to go on without Belle physically by my side and I still have those moments. Moments where I still can’t believe she is not with me, where I can touch her, feel her against my chest. Such strong and heart-wrenching thoughts and emotions …
I talk to her, she talks to me. And what keeps me going is her message to me that she wants me to go on, to enjoy life like we always did. She and I believe we have a choice in how we live life after a great loss. Do we choose darkness or do we choose the light?

Most of the times I can feel Belle so very close to me, she still gives me that special light of love that I treasure with all my heart. She definitely enjoyed the time together in Portugal as much as Kintana and I did. It was very special to be able to share this adventure with the three of us. And again, without her, leading me to Portugal, to Kintana, without her guidance all the way, I would have never been able to do this.
No matter where I go, no matter what I do, she is with me. I can feel Little Belle her beautiful smile, so full of magic, always watching us. Her smile makes me smile too, with tears in my eyes…


I’ve read a lot of comments where people mentioned that Kintana reminds them so much of Little Belle. And yes, they have a lot of resemblances. It’s for a reason why Belle guided me so perfectly to her. But she is different of course, having her own uniqueness, like we all have. There is only one Kintana.
There is only one Little Belle. That’s the miracle of life.



How beautifully Belle taught me that each day is a miracle. And she still does, giving me the courage and the strength to live life with all my heart, with passion, with wonder, with love, with magic.
I can see us standing on top of a high mountain, side by side, watching all nature’s beauty. Seeing the trees, the flowers, the sun, moon, and stars. Hear the soft blowing wind and the birds passing by. Smell the earthly scents and feel inside of us the secrets of life.
Together reaching the sky.
There are no limits.

Love is endless and forever 

Irene, Little Belle’s mom




  • Wendy Morey

    WOW. Very very touching. Thinking of my dear Spike while reading this. Oh how I miss him.

  • Donna Tanner

    Healing is different for all of us, no matter who we lose – most don’t heal completely, we feel the pain forever, and it’s okay, we learn to endure, we learn to cherish memories with passion we never knew we had within ourselves. We learn to smile when we go somewhere that reminds us of our lost love ones. We cry when something or someone reminds us of times lost. Healing is not a requirement, Its not a law or rule………..if we never heal, we are still okay. The heart we feel with, the spirit that breathes within us, the energy, the compassion, the emotions – we have them all, they care for us in ways that help us survive the loss……..they are our endurance, they are our survival, they are all that our loved ones created us to be… being all they were for us, and all we were for them………. Our angels will always remind us they never left at all……….

    • Little Belle

      So very true, dear Donna… Beautiful written. Even after death (physically), they are still our survival. Always with us, giving us the strength to hold on to life…
      Love, Irene

  • Carolyn

    Dear Irene, your story is so touching. You loved Belle unconditionally. You have a big heart. Belle would wamt you to love Kintana amd othet doggies that come into your life. You are a special person. Keep Little Belles spirit alive in all you do.

  • Julie Thompson

    Such lovely words. You are right Little Belle was Little Belle and Kintana is Kintana. It would not be fair to Kintana to compare her with Belle. She has come into your life at a time when the healing has begun. She will help with this process I am sure. I expect all your fur family has helped overcome the sadness you had when the warrior left you. It is wonderful to see you smile again. I am sure you will smile even more now with your new addition. I think of you a lot and send my love and friendship to you and Robert and of course all your fur family xxx

  • Cindy Rubin

    This the most amazingly written pieces I have had the prevledges to read.. so profoundly written! I felt your emotions they resonate with me. I too have felt a great loss and can relate to the emotions that erupt! You Irene have opened up a world of emotions that ring true! I see Belle in al your post and I too smile???

  • Tammy Watson

    You will never ever forget our precious Little Belle. The love and memories are a part of you. I dont know what I would do if it were my baby girl. With Kintana you will have new adventures, love and memories. Your heart is so kind and I am so sorry that it has to have such loss. You are a miracle to these babies.

  • YYodacato

    How did Belle lead you to Kintana. I just discovered Belle’s story a few weeks ago. Beautiful story.

  • Juanita Orrahood

    Beautifully said Irene. As I was reading this, I couldn’t help but think of my precious Bonnie and Cookie and how much I miss them every day. The love you and Little Belle share is unconditional and forever, with a bond that can never be broken. Little Belle will always be in your heart and by your side talking to you, guiding you and sharing the magic with you.

  • Myrna

    Beautifully said Irene. With one’s loss no one will know the sorrow we have but it is wonderful Little Belle led you to Kintana. Enjoy your new adventures with your family while Little Belle will be there in spirit. Always smiling and enjoying her surroundings. Hugs

  • thivat olivia

    je le savais que little Belle serait partout elle est venue pour moi plusieurs fois quand je demande un petit peu de courage en plus elle vient

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Social media & sharing icons powered by UltimatelySocial